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Miscarriage and the Workplace

I’ve seen quite a few articles on miscarriage and the workplace, and it looks like organisations are trying to get better at supporting their staff going through it.

Going through fertility treatment, experiencing baby loss and getting pregnant is a very personal process, so when it comes to baby loss, managing fertility treatments and appointments, keeping it quiet can be really difficult!!

I’ve listed some strategies from my own personal experience to help you try to maintain your privacy whilst you are on your fertility journey.

  1. What is the policy on leave and appointments? Some companies have fertility policies, so find out what your rights are – it will help when it comes to who you need to disclose to and what you are entitled to.
  2. Completely understand anyone keeping fertility treatments and baby loss a secret.  I can’t stress this enough, think very carefully about who you tell if you want to keep it quiet. Telling a manager might help if you need to be flexible with work and appointments or if you are feeling unwell but be mindful of those who you think will turn your disclosure into gossip.
  3. If possible, try to arrange appointments outside work hours, it makes things easier to keep private if you want to.
  4. If you are allowed, request remote or flexible working.  This can help not drawing attention to any appointments you need to attend when you are not due in for work.  You may need to issue a business case to put across the positive reasons for remote or flexible working.
  5. Fertility treatments and babyloss might involve taking medications that need to be taken at specific times. Carry your medications discreetly, if you need to take them during work hours, do so in a private location.
  6. Our mental health can take a big hit when going through babyloss and fertility treatments. Have some strategies in place to help you manage stress and emotions while at work. Take short breaks if you need to.
  7. Make sure you plan some self-care in your schedule so you have a good balance – adequate sleep, a balanced diet, exercise, and relaxing all contribute to your overall well-being.
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7 Benefits of Working with a Counsellor

7 benefits for a person who has gone through baby loss, miscarriage and or infertility to work with a counsellor who specialises in this.

 

Acceptance – A counsellor can help to validate and affirm your experiences and feelings in a non judgemental way.

Shared experience – A counsellor who has this experience understands the conflicting emotions and unique challenges it presents.

Understanding – A counsellor can understand the strengths and limitations of any health service, waiting times, and the importance of clear communication and empathy.

Break the silence – A counsellor will understand that people might experience a struggle to talk with those closest to them about this because they might find it uncomfortable or that some of the comments might be unintentionally hurtful.

Exploring feelings of guilt/blame – Those that have been through miscarriage and babyloss might go through feelings of guilt or blaming themselves, a counsellor can help them explore these feelings.

Resources – A counsellor will enable clients to connect with relevant resources, support groups, recommend books, blogs and podcasts etc.

Coping strategies – A counsellor might be able to recommend coping strategies to lighten anxiety related to fertility and loss.